ramblings

It has been an amazingly stressful time, but by yesterday, all was well. Tod JUST came out of the Cardiac Critical Care Unit yesterday morning, and by last night was already doing so well the nurses told him to stop making the other heart patients on the ward look bad! He dressed himself in a dapper button-up dress shirt and long pants, and just walks around the ward (sometimes with hoses and tubes attached) with a smile on his face. Amazing. (this is orange in his honor!)

I am so tired, but so amazingly happy for the first time in many months. However, I am also saddened by a friend’s tragic news today. Someone I do not know well, but already really have a special place for in my heart. I got up this morning to write her a note to see if she’d bring her beautiful daughter to see me and Tod next week, but I got her news that she was sick again, and can in no way ask her to come. She must be utterly scared and frightened. And now, I know very much what it is like to have a spouse be given a heart-breaking diagnosis. Hang in there, K!

I would bet that she also has a great support network. I have been overwhelmed by the kindness of our friends and family in the last few months and weeks. I need to buy more thank-you cards, and Tod’s still in the hospital!!

I know it will still be difficult after he gets home. But right now, with him doing so well, my heart (which as far as I know works fine!!) is so very light with happiness. It is a shame that it takes an emergency to remind us we are loved, or to connect with people we always think “I should call that person” but we never do. But the thing that is MOST important is that when we need them, they are there. And just so you, dear reader, know: If you need me for ANYTHING, YOU let me know. If I am able, I’ll be there for you. It’s the least I can do!

Now go out there and call or write someone you love, and let them know it. You never never know when something awful is going to happen and you won’t get to tell them you love them. I was lucky. I’ve had my marriage extended by years and years b/c the doctor found something very small wrong with my husband’s heart, and thought to mention it to him. I’ve never taken his love or our time together for granted, but I have been reminded that we are all but mortals, and our time together is fleeting. Better to spend it loving the people around you than wishing you had after they are gone.